We're excited to announce that we are going to win next year's Eurovision Song Contest! Our triumph is written in the stars. Our plan of attack is undefeatable: Opulent Gowns, Key Changes and So, So Much Spinning. Prepare to be DAZZLED.

Suggested talking points: Eurovision 2017 Announcement, Pizza Patronage, Toot Dollars, Gator Terror, Cheese Shortage, Goose Attack